On Our Mettle

They say life’s hard for the marginalized.  That the ordeals of being an outcast can get so unbearable it could make one’s life a misery.  Well, they’re right.

As gay guys from a hostile environment, we do know a thing or two about social exclusion – and it sucks.  But does this mean we have to constantly wallow in self-pity?  Is that all there’s to being marginalized?

When you know a lot of people are taking you as abnormal or sick, you’ve no choice but to prove to yourself – and to the people disrespecting you – that you’re healthy and no less than anybody else.

When your friends question your capability on whether or not you can function as other people in the society, you try hard to prove them otherwise.

Strangely enough, our cause of despair might very well end up being our source of determination. If we really think about it, this rejection is also challenging us to be on our mettle.

Don’t get it wrong, marginalization is not something to be welcomed or tolerated.  But when life presents it nonetheless, we shouldn’t just self-pity or seek the sympathy of others – that’s what losers do.

However, if we accept it as a challenge and reorient our mindset likewise, we will be better positioned to deal with the situation – that’s what would-be winners do.



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